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Things To Do When You've Stopped Needing Sleep

Categories: Crap
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Published on: November 21, 2004

Laies and gentlemen, I give you: insomnia.

My favorite monster has returned with a vengeance, and I thought I’d give you all a sneak peak into what I do with all of my glorious (sleep deprived, distant, half-remembered, copy-of-a-copy) free time. Well, first of all, I do things like this. And the post immediately before this. And other random stuff that has little to no bearing on any aspect of anything that might be useful.

And, before you ask, No, homework is not an option. If you think that you can do calculus at one in the morning when your total sleep for the week is less than the recommended healthy sleep for an adult for a single day, more power too you, but I can’t even do it after a full night’s sleep, even with caffeine, so it’s just not an option.

So what do I do? I think. A lot.

None of this though is in any way logical. Some of it is a lot like the following:

Most Famous: Being in the Dictionary

More Famous: Being in the Encyclopedia

Famous: Being in People

Less Famous: Being in the Newspaper

Least Famous: Being in Bed

Bed is awesome. It’s soft and warm, like a kitten. However, kittens grow into cats. This is why people want to be famous.

Eventually you get tired of just thinking this stuff, so you write it down. I have notebooks and notebooks full of this stuff. Ask me sometime, I’ll show them to you.

Isn’t it interseting how the mind can just think of things that have nothing to do with what’s going on right now? I was typing that bit about fame, and part of my mind was thinking, “Where did my bottle of cologne go? Didn’t I used to have cologne?” Cologne, of course is a city in France, and I don’t know what I was doing with a bottle of France, but chances are, I burned it.

Another thing that I do at night when it’s all late/early is listen to music. I usually just pick one artist out of my collection and set their stuff on shuffle for the rest of the night/morning.

I like sunflower seeds, but just the seed part, not the ones with the shells. Peanuts in the shell are fine, because there’s a decent amount of something useful inside. Sunflower seeds have a 3:1 shell to seed ratio. This is totally inefficient for mindless snacking.

Which brings me to another facet of late nights: Eating. It turns out that you burn more food being awake than whatever it is that thing is that you do when you’re not awake. Therefore, I eat 4-5 meals a day. (Breakfast, lunch, dinner, 10:00, 2:00, usually) I could so be a hobbit, but I don’t have the feet. (More’s the pity.)

That being said, Everquest II is not working for me right now, and I’m angry about that.

There was some interest expressed in my Mission – Codename: Applesauce, Applesauce, Applesauce CD. (Ok, one person.) If anybody’s interested in a copy, you can either e-mail me, or, if you attend Lakeside still, you can send requests through my sister. (Who will also serve as a delivery mechanism.)

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